Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
