You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Dick very happy bro
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize
