What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
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