Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
Randomize
