Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize