you traded sex for a burrito?
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
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