What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
So I just went to clothing optional bar
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
