Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Randomize