So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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