i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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