Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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