even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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