Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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