What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
