Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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