JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my nap took me to another dimension
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
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