i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
i just google imaged poop.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
