My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
i love accidental penises.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
