Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
