get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
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