His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
