We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize