Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Randomize
