I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Green mimosas i think yes
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
