I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
