You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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