It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
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I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
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Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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