I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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