Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
