Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Randomize
