Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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