I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
