There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
Dignity is for republicans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
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