Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
