the new term for farting is butt boxing.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Randomize
