It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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