Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Randomize
