i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
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