Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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