do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Randomize
