Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
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