it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff