Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize