quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
me + whiskey = a bad person
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
After tacos, we're chasing women.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
