Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Randomize
