I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
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