I accidentally had phone sex last night
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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