He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Randomize
