Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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