he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize