Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I seem to have left my pride at pride
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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