I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
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